Whole 30...Day 16

I have successfully made it past the halfway point. Me! The quitter!! The excuse-maker!! The never-follows-thru-girl!!! And I've started PiYo. (Pilate's and Yoga hybrid) Yesterday was my first day. It was all instructional on how to properly do the moves correctly. And it kicked my ass. I am feeling muscle burns today like I haven't in a very long time. But today is leg day and I am ready to get home, play with my boys, make a Whole 30 dinner, and workout. I actually like the way the hurt feels. For those of you who know me you are probably thinking, "Whaaaa??? Who is this girl who has taken over Rach?? She likes to eat cupcakes and binge watch cooking shows on netflix." This picture kinda describes how I'm feeling:

God, I love me some Tyra.

How I'm feeling besides being a fierce, smizing, bitch like Tyra: I actually have way more energy. It's great because Scot is teething right now and I am getting a lot less sleep. My anxiety has lessened greatly and if it keeps up maybe I can go off my meds. (Please, please, please!!) I'm also not as hungry in between meals. (LOVE!) I feel positive about this experience and everything that I'm learning about food and my body's reaction to food.

So, that's me on Day 16. I've got a few things I'm working on for the next few blogs. If you have any questions about my Whole 30 experience I'd love to hear them.

Whole 30...Day 13

Who has 2 thumbs and is almost halfway thru their Whole 30? 

Have I wanted to cheat and eat one of those giant pieces of Ukrops cake that they sell by the Grill checkout at Martin's? Oh. Hell. Yeah. But I haven't! I found this awesome little thing that I used to know very little about. Willpower. I found out that this bitch can make shit happen. (Thanks Tina Fey) I am currently wearing a pair of jeans (with no, I repeat NO muffin top) that I haven't been able to comfortably wear in over 2 years. The non-scale victories are pretty awesome. But what is also pretty awesome is that I'm actually enjoying this. Not every second but more often then not. I feel less anxiety, I feel more energy, I look forward to eating real food, and I have zero cravings for fast food. This shit is CRAY!!

I'm starting to plan life after my 30 days are up. Do I want to keep a paleo diet? Do I want to do an 80/20 type thing? I know that I won't say goodbye to treats forever but I do know that I want them to be just that, treats. Not snacks, or lunch. So I'm still doing this. And I love it. 

Whole 30...Day 5

Well, today was hard. I had the day off from work and it felt like bad food choices were flaunting themselves to me all day. I said no to them each time they reared their ugly heads. (I'm pretty sure that food is alive to me right now) I may have even told the pop tarts to go eff themselves when I hurried past that aisle at the grocery store. 

I made it to dinner. Delicious, delicious dinner. Dinner made saying no to those bitch pop tarts so worth it. Dinner tasted so much better then that processed crap I craving all day. This was dinner:

Pork loin that slowly cooked all day in the crockpot seasoned with tomato sauce, cumin, cayenne, oregano, sea salt, cracked black pepper, and just a dash of cinnamon. I topped it with homemade guacamole and pico. Oh my. It was heaven in my mouth. 

I'm feeling pretty ok. Is that a real thing? I still miss coffee creamer. I still have cravings. But it's day 5 and I still don't want to cheat. If I did, I would have. I also had my first non-scale victory yesterday. It's almost embarrassing to share but IDGAF. My husband asked me if I was wearing one of my girdles. I wasn't. Mama was feeling herself after that. Another plus is that I've noticed a slight increase in my milk production when I pump at work (YAY FOR MAMA'S MILK) So cravings suck but the positives are outweighing the negatives. 5 days in, I've still got this.  

Whole 30...Day 1

I really think that I am a fit girl trapped in a fat girls body. And I'm done with that. I'm tired of feeling uncomfortable doing simple tasks like carrying the car seat outside. I'm tired of having 30 different sweaters so I never have to show my arms and can cover my stomach. I'm tired of hearing, "but you have such a pretty face." I'm tired of the swollen ankles, the sore back, the weak core. I'm angry that I get so freaking tired having a dance-off with Briton.

That's the one that did it. The anger. The anger sparked something in me. I am a strong fucking woman. I've had two vaginal births for goodness sake, I can make the change. So this is day 1. And I'm rocking it. I'm ready to drop some pounds and get in shape. I'm ready to do a mud run with my girlfriends because are some fierce-ass bitches. I'm ready to fuel my body instead of feed my feelings. I'm ready to have a dance off with Briton and dance until he drops.

I'm going to try to use this blog almost like a diary, an outlet for my sugar withdraw symptoms and caffeine headache bitch fests. And a way to make myself accountable. I'm ready to change my relationship with food and I am ready to make a change within myself and really make my health and wellness a top priority. I want to be that example for my boys.

How I'm feeling:
Pretty good....a little hungry but I will get used to not overeating. My head is killing me because my usual 3 huge cups of coffee filled with delicious creamer has been 1 cup of black tea and one small cup of black coffee. (YUCK) My morning pump looked good, I got 10 ounces of breast milk which is what I aim for everyday so I'm happy with that. I made a motivation board and that actually does help. I'm feeling ready for this change.

If you are confused as to what the hell this whole 30 program that I'm talking about is, please take a look at http://whole30.com/whole30-program-rules/.

PS-there will be before and after pictures.

I would hold you for a million years

Dear Briton,
The first words out of my mouth to you when I got home from work tonight were, "No, I need a minute." You wanted to play, I wanted decompress. And right now I'm sitting in the glider that still sits in your bedroom, quietly begging you to go to sleep as I write this. I almost hope you never read this, but then again, if you have kids...I hope you do.

Here it it, my confession: Being a parent is hard. Sometimes I cry in the shower. I lie to you. I'm not really as excited as you are to play guys. I'm scared of thunderstorms too. I think the medicine tastes yucky too. Shots hurts. I wish I could sleep in. I miss being able to go out. I really don't like dealing with wet sheets. I worry about money all the time. And Spongebob, yeah, he's annoying but he makes a great babysitter.

So....I feel like a horrible mommy tonight, but tomorrow when you open your sweet brown eyes, we both get a whole new day. We get a day where maybe I don't want to play guys but I sure do love watching your imagination at work. We get a day where you fall asleep holding my hand. We get a day where you see I'm a little sad so you give me a Briton cuddle that takes all the yuck out of the medicine and all the fear out of the storms.

Briton, I am not ever going to be perfect. But when I'm wrong, I'll say I'm sorry. When you're scared, I'll hold you tight. When you're brave, I'll encourage you. When you're sad, I'll wipe away your tears. And when your happy, I'll share in the joy. I'll cry a little bit at every stage, you went from baby to boy in a blink. I'm listening to your soft breathing now as you're drifting into sleep and I'm just so grateful for all you have taught me in humility and compassion.

You may not always get what you want but I promise, you'll always have what you need. You'll always get my heart.
As long as I'm living, my baby you'll be.

Love,
Mommy
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:Home

A change in seasons

Fall. My favorite season. I can't wait to eat and drink pumpkin everything. I have recipes galore to test out this Fall and a few fun crafts for Briton and I to create together, but before we dive into the deliciousness of the season lets back up and discuss the first 3 weeks of September.

On September 4th my sweet boy started Preschool. Sigh. How the hell did that happen? I'm pretty sure he was just wearing a "Mommy's new man" onesie a few weeks ago...but back to reality, Briton is growing up. It's such a fun journey to be a part of, I love seeing things thru his eyes and learning life all over again with him as my guide. So far, he can remember one of his classmates names, Henry, but not his best friend Henry, a different one. I take this as a victory, that he's slowly climbing out of his shell that goes up when Mommy and Daddy (or Grandma) aren't around. He's learned the cutest prayer ever (that maybe I have him recite for EVERYONE like it's some kind of parlor trick) and he's finally figured out how to hold a pencil, 2 more victories.

Also this month is my moms birthday and because she is AWESOME my mom celebrates her birthday on the first day of Fall. Briton loves to have pretend birthday parties for his family...pretty much daily so when he found out that Grandma's real birthday was coming up he couldn't wait to start planning her REAL party (they are best friends after all and you need to plan you best friends party). His party venue of choice was Chuck-E-Cheese. Thankfully after some mommy manipulation he was convinced that his 2nd choice, Stevie B's, was a much better choice. My younger sister drove down and joined my Mom, Dennis, Briton and I and we had a great night. I don't know the last time I saw my Mom as happy as she was at her birthday party. It was silly and fun but so is our family so it worked out perfectly.

For her cake my mom requested and almond cake with chocolate buttercream. Briton wanted to help so I looked for a recipe that was simple enough to really involve him. I'm so excited that he enjoys baking, he questions each ingredient and takes a real pride in what he's doing. It's pretty awesome to have this shared hobby. So after some tweaking this is what I came up with, the almond flavor was light and worked well with my go-to chocolate buttercream recipe.


Cake:

2 cups all-purpose flour, spooned and leveled, sifted after measuring
1&1/4 cup white sugar
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup unsalted butter, softened
1 cup milk
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1&1/4 teaspoon almond extract
2 eggs

*Preheat oven to 350 degrees and grease and flour 2 8-inch cake pans.
*In a large mixing bowl sift together the flour, sugar, baking powder and salt.
*Add milk, butter, and vanilla and almond extracts. Beat with a hand mixer for about 3-4 minutes, scraping the sides of the bowl occasionally. Add the eggs and beat for another 3 minutes.
*Pour the batter into the prepared pans, dividing equally among both. Bake 30-35 minutes until your cake tester comes out clean.
*Cool in pans on wire racks for about 10 minutes, flip out cakes and cool completely on racks before frosting.

Chocolate Buttercream Frosting:

1 cup unsalted butter, softened
3&1/2-4 cups powdered sugar
3/4 cup Hershey's cocoa powder
1/2 teaspoon table salt
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 teaspoon almond extract
4 tablespoons heavy cream

*Cream the butter for a few minutes in a stand mixer with the paddle attachment on medium speed.
* TURN THE MIXER OFF! Sift together 3&1/2 cups of the sugar and all of the cocoa powder into the mixing bowl. Turn mixer on lowest speed and mix at this speed until the dry ingredients are absorbed by the butter.
*Increase speed to medium and add extracts, salt, and heavy cream. Beat for another 3 minutes.
*If the frosting is too thin add more sugar, if it too thick add more cream 1 teaspoonful at a time.



Now, frost that cake!!! I hope you try this recipe and enjoy it with your loved ones. Any day can be a special occasion and a special occasion needs cake!










Until we eat again,
Rachael


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:My couch

Gratitude and pumpkin muffins

Whoops, how did I go 2 months between blog posts? Life just happens sometimes I guess. I hope everyone is having a wonderful Fall, ours has been eventful and quite fun. Between weddings and outings Briton and I have kept ourselves pretty busy.

Since Thanksgiving is quickly approaching I wanted to share with you just a few things, first a few thoughts on gratitude and second, a recipe for yummy pumpkin muffins.

I try to make it a regular part of my day to make a gratitude list of at least 5 things that I am grateful for that day. Some days I use an app I have on my phone, some days I write a list in my journal and some days its just a list I have in my head. Those lists have changed my life. It didn't happen over night but it happened. I find gratitude in things that used to cause me pain, imagine that! I used to have several repeats on my lists and while I am still so grateful I am actually finding more and more things on a daily basis for which to be grateful. It's amazing and I love it.  A-Z gratitude lists, so I have made several of these over the past several months but a dear friend made one the other day shared it and it inspired me to make one and share it with you all. So here it is:

A: Apples, I love them, Brit loves them. There is just something about that first juicy, crunchy bite.

B: Briton. He is my joy. He's my teacher of life as much as I am his, I find myself frequently in awe of his kind and compassionate soul.

C: Cake. YUM! I love to bake it and I love to eat it.

D: Donuts. I'm grateful for cake too so it this a surprise?

E: Elizabeth Craft, my Mom and Britons incredible Grandma.

F: Fall and all the beauty it brings. The changing leaves, football, pumpkin pie and birthday presents. :)

G: Georgia. I miss my dear friend. Why is it so hard for me to pick up that phone?

H: Healing, slowly and surely, with the help of many, it's happening.

I: The "ic". If you know what the "ic" is I am grateful because now I recognize it.

J: July 4th, 2012. Fireworks on the dock with Jenny and Julia. That is a memory that instantly brings a smile to my face.

K: Kool Smiles, they gave Briton an award for being cavity-free. AWESOME!

L: Lessons...good and bad, they must be learned and even if I'm not happy to learn them I'm grateful they're there.

M: Motherhood, what an adventure.

N: No. It's a word that was never easy for me to use but now I am learning how to set healthy boundaries and say no if that's what the answer should be.

O: Olive oil....Oh how I love thee...

P: Parents, blood and step,  I am grateful for you.

Q: Quiet snuggles in the morning, it's worth waking up 15 minutes early to have that special time before the hussle and bussle starts.

R: Rachael Stewart. Because she is learning and changing and I really like who she's becoming.

S: Sisters. My sisters I was born with are truly some of the most important people in my heart and life and I'm so grateful for them. The sisters that God added to my life are also such blessings to me.

T: Tacos. mmmmm....

U: Underwear, the good kind. The kind that makes you feel sexy all day long just knowing you're wearing them even if no one sees them.

V: Vision. Something I take for granted daily but I wouldn't know what to do without.

W:Wi-fi....

X: Xtra (I know, I cheated) hour of the day today.

Y: You, who ever is reading this. I'm grateful for you taking the time to read my blog.

Z: Zzzz's, as in catching them. I've been having a lot of trouble sleeping lately so a good night of sleep is something that I am really grateful for.

So that is my list, what makes you feel gratitude?

Now on to the pumpkin muffins. When VA was worried we would get hit by Hurricane Sandy I had some things in my fridge I wanted to get rid of so I decided to do some baking. I found this recipe online and made a few changes. I enjoyed the outcome and I hope you give them a try and enjoy them too.

PUMPKIN MUFFINS

3 cups all-purpose flour
2 tablespoons pumpkin pie spice
2 tablespoons baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
3 cups granulated sugar
1-15 once can of 100% pure pumpkin
2 large eggs
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1/4 cup applesauce
1/2 orange juice

Preheat oven to 350 and grease 30 muffin cups.

Combine flour, pumpkin pie spice, baking soda and salt in a large bowl. Combine remaining ingredients in a mixing bowl and beat until just blended. Add flour mixture to the pumpkin mixture and stir until just moistened. Spoon batter into prepared muffin cups, filling 3/4 full.

Bake for 25-30 or until wooden pick inserted in centers comes out clean. Cool in pans on wire racks for about 10 minutes; remove to wore racks to cool completely. Store muffins in covered container or resealable plastic bag.

These muffins freeze well!!

I am looking at some new dishes to try this year at Thanksgiving and would love to hear some of your thoughts. I will doing a Thanksgiving blog post soon.

Until we eat again,
Rachael